A Response To The Things We See Doesn’t Mean You’re Broken…

A common phrase we hear in the First Responder and Emergency Services world is “You knew what you were signing up for”.

It’s a blanket statement, usually lobbed in a dismissive tone, which equates to “You don’t get to complain, because you willingly chose this”. Full stop. End of conversation.

So, if we hadn’t already been raised with the “suck it up attitude”, we could easily internalise that fact we seemingly aren’t allowed to complain, or acknowledge any of the challenging parts, because the choice to perform our First Responder role was ours and ours alone, so no one wants to hear it.

But what does it actually mean when we sign up to be a police officer, a firefighter, an EMT/EMS/Paramedic, a correctional officer or a dispatcher? What should we have known?

We sign up for many reasons, but mostly it stems from a desire to help people and to serve our community, in whatever capacity we feel drawn to the most.

We are usually informed on our first day of training or the academy, that we’ve just been granted “tickets to the greatest show on earth!” We are told we will see some cool things, some terrible thing and things that no one else will ever see or experience….and then sent on our way. We train, we learn the skills and knowledge required to perform our respective roles, but are never really taught how to cope with the awful, the terrible, the unimaginable and the truly heartbreaking.

How do you teach someone to cope with the things that we see? What’s the right equation to learn from? Take the worst thing you could possibly imagine, times it by 1000 and you might get close; then calculate that to anywhere from two to five shifts per week, for 52 weeks a year, for a 25+ year career. Easy!

I’m obviously not trying to be facetious, but more respond to the absurdity of the dismissive statement we hear time and time again. (It’s probably the favourite one we like to hear, along with “I pay your salary”). Because of course we know that signing up to be any kind of frontline member means we’re going to see some terrible things, but no one could ever truly prepare you for that, it’s impossible. We don’t know how it’s going to look, to sound, to smell or feel that very first time you experience something beyond imagination that you know can’t be dinner conversation when asked “How was your day, dear?”.

Additionally, we also don’t know how we’ll respond and react in the moment, or in the aftermath. That physiologically evolved stress response of ours isn’t something we can easily control, but we learn. Our initial buzz of adrenaline and excitement quells from those early emergency responses, our muscle memory starts to kick in, experience becomes resilience and our baseline changes.

We gain more knowledge, learn some tricks from seasoned members and become better skilled, all the while being exposed to more and more trauma along the way. There are a number of great analogies that I’m sure you’ve all heard; the backpack with the rocks, the cup or bucket with the water. Despite whatever your favourite imagery might be, the notion remains the same. If we don’t process the things we see and experience as a First Responder in healthy, adaptive ways, our backpack will get too heavy and our cup or bucket will begin to overflow.

Nothing happens all at once, it’s an incremental process……a quiet build up, that can result in an avalanche if we don’t look after ourselves and learn to cope properly and appropriately.

But there’s something we are often not told; having a response to trauma is actually very normal. It’s not weakness or vulnerability and definitely not something to be ashamed of. It doesn’t mean you’re broken or can’t do your job. It’s simply a stress response that can present physically, mentally or emotionally. We are exposed to trauma potentially every shift we work, therefore it should be part of our education or training as to how it can and most likely will, show up in our lives. Our bodies and minds are built to adapt to keep up safe, so any response is designed to do exactly that, but our needs can also continue to change and evolve. So understanding that’s it’s just part of our physiology can help us identify when we might be experiencing it.

But our response can be as unique as we are as individuals and is influenced by our past experiences. This includes back to our childhood, (ACE scores) the other stressors in our life, genetic predispositions and our available coping skills, resources and support network we have access to lean on.  What works to cope and calm down for one person won’t necessarily be the right strategy for another, and that’s ok. The priority should really be about proactively getting in tune with yourself, understanding you mind and body, acknowledging when something feels a little off, learning what the best things are to help you cope in that moment and implementing long term practices and strategies that can not only act preventatively, but mitigate the severity too.

Due to the nature of our roles, we tend to be a resilient bunch. If we already weren’t, we wouldn’t last a week as a First Responder. I think we all know a few who didn’t. Experiencing a stress response after being exposed to trauma day in and day out, like I mentioned, is normal. Many of us probably have and haven’t realised it, but the symptoms have just faded away within a couple of days, which is the natural course of things, our equilibrium returned to normal, and we went on with our lives.

Feeling agitated, easily angered and hypervigilant for no reason, having trouble sleeping, experiencing nightmares or flashbacks about the incident (or one of many), feeling numb or disconnected from our emotions, losing interest in things that normally you enjoy or look forward to, feeling excessively fatigued, not wanting to think about the incident or avoiding the place and/or people, engaging more in risky behaviours, drinking or smoking to excess, experiencing GI upset, headaches or trouble eating, having interpersonal conflict more than usual and generally just not feeling like yourself….all of these things can be a normal response to trauma.

The only concern is when they last for longer than a month, they begin to impact or impair your daily functionality, or both.

The difference for us as First Responders as opposed to the general public, is the constant, continual and cumulative nature of our exposure. It never stops. Which is the exact reason we have higher rates of and susceptibility to, experiencing mental and behavioural health challenges, such as depression, anxiety, PTSD, burnout and suicidal ideation. And the fact, whether by choice or necessity, we often are forced to repress our immediate response and emotions, because in the moment, we must focus on the job we’re trained to do. Or we don’t have adequate time to process what we may have just experienced, because someone else needs our help and we’re on to the next job.

The danger here is, obviously unprocessed trauma, in our minds and our bodies, doesn’t just magically disappear and evaporate all on its own. The down cycle of our stress response is meant to occur, so we can return to homeostasis and our system can rest, recover and engage in restoration. When we don’t have the opportunity to complete this cycle, everything can build up, our bodies can get stuck switched “on” and the stress response symptoms can become chronic and unmanageable.

Encouraging you to recognise your increased risks isn’t meant to scare you or make you think there’s no hope. This is your fate, you must accept it. It’s to make it clear how imperative it is to understand how we are impacted on a daily basis and what we can do to mitigate that impact. Some people cope just fine, others experience challenges along the way, there is no rhyme or reason for either outcome. But understanding the facts can help up make tactical decisions along the length of our careers, that provide better outcomes for ourselves, our colleagues and our families.

Trauma exposure is part of our role as a First Responder. Exhibiting a stress response as a result is normal. It’s how our body is trying to respond and keep us safe. Knowing what we “sign up for” and recognising how it can not only show up, but impact our lives is two different things. We can’t possibly ever truly know, but we can take important actions and steps to help us cope, by practicing and implementing coping skills and strategies, both proactively and preventatively, while on the job and in the aftermath.

(This article was originally contributed to Battallion 1 Consultants, as part of Firefighter Safety Stand Down Week, 2025. The theme was "Break The Stigma: Behavioural Health RESET" - Recognise, Educate, Strategies, Empower and Training.)