Boundaries

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You don't have to set yourself on fire to keep other people warm.

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What do I mean by that? 

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You shouldn't have to sacrifice any part of yourself to have a healthy relationship with someone. That includes your mental health, your time, your personal comfort or values.

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Feeling overwhelmed, burnt out, anxious, or noticing you have begun avoiding certain people you usually like or love spending time with, can be a response to unhealthy boundaries.

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Boundaries are essential in every relationship for it to be healthy. Many people avoid setting boundaries, as it can be awkward or uncomfortable to have honest and explicit conversations with people about our expectations. Or we avoid doing so out of fear; of their reaction, of damaging the relationship or of our own responsibility to uphold those boundaries once clearly stated.

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However, if we don't speak up and advocate for ourselves, who will? Allowing aspects you are unhappy with, find unacceptable or inappropriate in a relationship to continue, only breeds resentment, frustration and anger. How can we genuinely get mad at someone for continuing a certain behaviour, if we have never explicitly stated our feelings about it? Assumptions lead to misunderstandings and miscommunication.

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If there are relationships in your life you are unhappy with and need help finding the right balance or support with implementing boundaries, please reach out. I would love to be the one to help you.